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Request for reviewing and grading my argument essay

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Request for reviewing and grading my argument essay [#permalink] New post 21 Jun 2017, 22:01
ARGUMENT ESSAY

An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

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A recommendation has been suggested by an international development organisation in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus. It suggests that a new breed of millet high in vitamin A has been engineered to overcome the problem of Vitamin A deficiency prevalent in Tagus. The recommendation is based on certain assumptions. First, since the new type of millet seeds are costly, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Second, since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. Hence, They suggest that the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.

Though the recommendation sounds appealing, arguments can be viewed from different perspectives which may make the assumptions lose their stand. Firstly, we are not aware of the credibility of the organisation which has made such suggestion. It may not be an acclaimed organisation and hence, poses a question mark on its authenticity. Even if we assume that it is a trust-worthy organisation , it has not suggested any report to back its claim. It has not reported any evidence that can validate such action. It has not suggested whether this new millet type has been applied in any other country. We are not sure about its chances of yielding successful results. It has not given any statistics about the amount of new millet to be used considering the population of Tagus. There are may unstated facts about the recommendation and hence, it can't be taken at its face value.

Secondly, it has been mentioned that the seeds of the new millet are expensive. We don't know from where the funds will come to support them. Even if subsidy is given, we don't know if the farmers would want to experiment with a new type of crop since that may or may not be profitable for them. There many factors like whether the new crop will be cultivable in the soil of Tagus, whether environmental factors will support it,etc. We don't know if the subsidy would be sufficient to provide incentive to farmers to go ahead with new crop. It would be better if new millet is experimented at a small patch of land first.
Thirdly, we can't blindly assume that people would readily adapt to new millet type. We don't know the amount of Vitamin A in new millet and hence, it may lead to harmful side-effects. Also, there is no data given if in the past, people adapted readily to a different millet type apart from their regular staple. Past records should be checked before jumping to any conclusion.

In the conclusion, I would say that the government should consider all facts before promoting any recommendation. It should validate the authenticity of the organisation, ask for statistical reports to understand the situation well, hold some health camps to find out the proportion of population facing issue of vitamin A deficiency consider all scientific facts and check if it has necessary funds to support new strategies. The government should try to develop new public health schemes to help people.
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Re: Request for reviewing and grading my argument essay [#permalink] New post 24 Jun 2017, 23:11
i request someone to please review the essay.
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Re: Request for reviewing and grading my argument essay [#permalink] New post 27 Jun 2017, 06:26
i request someone to please review the essay.
Re: Request for reviewing and grading my argument essay   [#permalink] 27 Jun 2017, 06:26
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