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Please Review my GRE Issue Essay in GRE score band 0-6

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Please Review my GRE Issue Essay in GRE score band 0-6 [#permalink] New post 07 Jan 2018, 12:22
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Topic :- The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Answer

Today in this world, every group wants some one to setup as a leader to represent his group. Here responsibilities of leader doesn't includes majorly his self development but development of whole group. To acheive this, one has to be a team player as well as a incisive person. Therefore, i partially agree with the argument raised in the question.As a leader, person should have sense of cooperation to act as team player as well as a sense of competition to act as a proactive leader and not dull one.

Firstly, The leader should have a sense of cooperation because any group becomes successful by his team members and not by his captain i.e. leader in this case. For example, Indian cricket Team attained No. 1 Test position not because Virat Kohli, his captain perfomed well but he cooperatives efficiently with his team members , judging strong and weak points of them and thus leading his team to acme of success. Similarly, in politics , a political person cannot take care of larger group of people without taking support from his party members.For example, Narendra Modi, prime minister of india cannot listen complains of every citizen of India, thats why he has to cooperates with his party members and state chief ministers to find solution of their problems.

Furthermore, I also believe a leader should also have sense of cooperation in order to take a biased position in case of debates within the group. In many cases when groups becomes larger, all members doesnt have same vision and many times have conflicts amongst members. So in this case, role of leader becomes important to cooperative with them and listen both party members points in unbiased manner to find a appropriate solution. However, even though leader having a sense of cooperation cannot be successful untill he has sense of competition instilled in himself.

The sense of competition is necessary for them to carry forward their group as a proactive leader rather than as a dull leader. Today, in this world of competition everyone wanted a power and superiority in their postion, so without having a sense of competion i.e. to be motivated in making oneself or one's group ahead of others doesn't guarnteed absolute sucess in relevant field. For example, in politics BJP in winning all Lok Sabha and Rajya Sabha Elections in India but if they will not a put a check on Congress party activities in upcoming elections then they may loose the elections due to Congress prooving themself as more suitable for that elections. So here sense of competition helps to never become overconfident and dull in their respective actions

To conclude, I must say that today young peoples should not only instilled with sense of cooperation but also sense of competition in order to make them better leaders of future because not only sense of cooperation will help them in taking their group members as a well founded group but also sense of competition will help them gain competitive advantage over other parties.
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Re: Please Review my GRE Issue Essay in GRE score band 0-6 [#permalink] New post 10 Jan 2018, 02:08
Expert's post
It is really good. Nothing really to point out. I would add some examples in the 1st and 2nd paragraphs.

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Re: Please Review my GRE Issue Essay in GRE score band 0-6   [#permalink] 10 Jan 2018, 02:08
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