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Kindly review my essay: Educational institutions Responsible

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Kindly review my essay: Educational institutions Responsible [#permalink] New post 28 Jul 2018, 00:13
Prompt: Educational institutions should actively encourage their students to choose fields of study that will prepare them for lucrative careers

In contemporary world, there is an emerging concern about the role of educational system in student’s orientation. Some claim that university and college should galvanize students to choose well-paid jobs, while others maintain that the job decision should be made by students. In my opinion, I am for the latter.

First and foremost, career selection should be made by students, since each individual has their own ardor and talent in some subjects. For example, students who are good at mathematics, science and logical reasoning would feel daunting when they are forced to learn literature by heart. By contrast, some with talent at Humanity may find solving differential equations undoable.  Therefore, educational institutions should not encourage students to choose lucrative jobs, but discovering their potential and supporting them to pursue their dreams in stead. It is undoubtable that if one loves and devotes their time for a particular job, they are not only able to earn a great salary from this job, but they also will find the job satisfaction. The globe have seen many people changing the world without university’s orientations. Take one of the “Tech-titans” - Elon Musk as an example, he started everything from scratch, and now he is changing the world with many groundbreaking progressions in Astronomy. That is the evidence for the fact that one can success in any field if and only if their love what they do.

Another reason to against this policy is that the definition of “lucrative careers” are change unexpectedly, relying on the demand of the society. The higher number of workers in a specific fields, the lesser demand from society, therefore when educational institutions orient students to choose a particular jobs, the society would be inundated with an abundant workforce which breeds an serious imbalance, and thus that job will no longer a lucrative job. Additionally, some auspicious careers such as actuary or doctor require a great deal of effort and money, and thus, students not only dedicate completely to the career progression but also possess a great financial background. Hence, if universities just show the students the salary level they can get after graduating without the difficulties in the fields, students may be blinkered and squander a precious time in university.

By and large, students should make their own decision for their own career. Besides, the role of educational institutions is to discover student’s potential as well as support them to achieve their dreams in stead of encourage them to pursue well-paid careers.
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Re: Kindly review my essay: Educational institutions Responsible [#permalink] New post 02 Aug 2018, 14:34
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As a starting point, your writing is not that bad, even though it lacks of punctuation here and there and the essay should be more stretched and longer.

See here for reference https://greprepclub.com/forum/greprepcl ... -3426.html

Hope this helps.

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Re: Kindly review my essay: Educational institutions Responsible [#permalink] New post 19 Feb 2019, 03:27
Hello! I agree with you that the problem is that one part of people think that schools, colleges, universities and other educational institutions should encourage schoolcchildren, students to choose high-paying jobs to have a good future, and other people think that schoolchildren, students should motivate themselves independently, without a help of these educational institutions, to choose jobs that are given a high salary to have a great future. You completely right, in that students should motivate themselves independently, but I do not have a desire to agree with the fact that schools, colleges, universities, and other educational institutions don't should do this instead of students for them AT ALL. What I mean? I believe that schools, colleges, universities, and other educational institutions should present to students directions that are connected to companies in which people can get high salaries, and also these educational institutions should teach how a schoolchild or a student can get into an industry whose specialists are paid good money. Let's take an example! That is, various educational institutions should show that being a teacher is not profitable, but to be a professional who works for the college essay writing company www.paperial.com is very profitable. Also, educational institutions should say that in order to become a teacher - a student need to graduate and need to have a diploma in which there are only excellent grades, but in order to become a writing professional, a student must graduate from the university and must have a diploma in which there are not only excellent grades, as well as any other grades, but in order to become a professional in writing, a student needs to complete 2-5 professional courses, must win tournaments and so on. Schools and other edu. institutions should present this information to students. And students should motivate themselves, having information about WHAT THEY CAN ACHIEVE, HOW THEY CAN ACHIEVE IT, WHAT THEY SHOULD DO TO ACHIEVE IT. Students can formulate an answer to the motivational question: WHY SHOULD I ACHIEVE THIS? easily!!! when they have the answers to all the questions that I have suggested earlier. In conclusion, I want to wish all students to set high goals that are difficult to achieve, and I wish all students to achieve their goals!
Re: Kindly review my essay: Educational institutions Responsible   [#permalink] 19 Feb 2019, 03:27
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