It is currently 22 Aug 2017, 14:23
My Tests

Close

GMAT Club Daily Prep

Thank you for using the timer - this advanced tool can estimate your performance and suggest more practice questions. We have subscribed you to Daily Prep Questions via email.

Customized
for You

we will pick new questions that match your level based on your Timer History

Track
Your Progress

every week, we’ll send you an estimated GMAT score based on your performance

Practice
Pays

we will pick new questions that match your level based on your Timer History

Not interested in getting valuable practice questions and articles delivered to your email? No problem, unsubscribe here.

Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :)

  Question banks Downloads My Bookmarks Reviews Important topics  
Author Message
TAGS:
Intern
Intern
Joined: 06 Aug 2017
Posts: 6
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 0 [0], given: 0

Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :) [#permalink] New post 06 Aug 2017, 05:44
The question:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:

The world of business is massive and growing in scope and sophistication.
Leadership in business calls for an array of knowledge, skills and experiences; and there are many paths to business leadership.
In his opening remarks, Henry Mintzberg argues that MBAs somehow block those who have \"earned their managerial stripes\"
from making it to the executive suite.

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of
reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument.
For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and
what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion.
You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument
would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.

My essay:
The argument presented by the author evaluates the world of business and questions the paradigm of preference for MBA degree holders
over those who "earned their managerial stripes from making it to the executive suite". The argument presented by the author is unclear and
hence gives way to several loopholes in his supporting statement.

Firstly, when the authors states that MBAs "somehow block" other aspirants of executive positions, how does he come to this conclusion?
What number/percentage of companies follow this trend? Or is it a regional practice? He does not mention any empirical data to substantiate his claims.
Every company in today's world values long term employees and provides preference to them despite the absence of managerial degrees.
Cognizant Technology Solutions, a majot IT firm for example, provides preference to internal employees for various executive positions over hiring new ones despite differences in degrees.

Further, the author seems skeptical about those who hold an MBA degree being preferred for managerial positions than employees who do not. He does not draw comparisons or explain how
the latter would make a better leader. CEOs appointed in past few years, Satya Nadella by Microsoft or Sundar Pichai by Google, for example are both
MBAs and have proven to be successful leaders so far. Also, as a result of globalization, a majority of major firms observe employees from all around the world.
Hence, an upgrade in leadership skills for such a scenario is required. Moreover, many companies such as United Spirits Ltd., often offer to finance their employees' MBA fee so that they can get the required skill or exposure.
The author does not seem to take this into account in any of his assumptions.

In conclusion, I would like it state that with the rapid growth of business in today's times, increase in competition and the inevitable mixed cultured work environment,
having a clear understanding of the market and learning to lead all kinds of employees are an important characteristics of the leaders of today.
Therefore, besides the important exposure and value that work experience brings and is thus upheld, having an MBA degree is a plus, and thus its importance should not be undermined.


Please provide feedback on areas which can be improvised. :)
Moderator
Moderator
User avatar
Joined: 18 Apr 2015
Posts: 1837
Followers: 26

Kudos [?]: 245 [0], given: 1068

Re: Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :) [#permalink] New post 06 Aug 2017, 10:18
Expert's post
The AWA is fairly good. However, I would insert some strong examples to reinforce your reasoning, weakening the author's point of view.

Moreover, I would stretch it a little more.

Look here greprepclub-guide-to-awa-the-clear-cut-3426.html

Regards
_________________

Get the 17 FREE GREPrepclub Tests

Intern
Intern
Joined: 06 Aug 2017
Posts: 6
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 0 [0], given: 0

Re: Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :) [#permalink] New post 07 Aug 2017, 23:29
Thanks a lot for your feedback. Could you please provide a few examples as well? As in, I would like to know what examples would be considered strong.

Posted from my mobile device Image
Moderator
Moderator
User avatar
Joined: 18 Apr 2015
Posts: 1837
Followers: 26

Kudos [?]: 245 [0], given: 1068

Re: Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :) [#permalink] New post 08 Aug 2017, 02:39
Expert's post
Hi,

I have already gave you this link greprepclub-guide-to-awa-the-clear-cut-3426.html

At the bottom you do have the links you looking for

regards
_________________

Get the 17 FREE GREPrepclub Tests

Intern
Intern
Joined: 06 Aug 2017
Posts: 6
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 0 [0], given: 0

Re: Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :) [#permalink] New post 09 Aug 2017, 01:19
Oh yes. My bad. Thanks a lot! :)

Posted from my mobile device Image
Re: Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :)   [#permalink] 09 Aug 2017, 01:19
Display posts from previous: Sort by

Kindly grade my essay. It's my first Argument Essay :)

  Question banks Downloads My Bookmarks Reviews Important topics  


GRE Prep Club Forum Home| About| Privacy Policy| Terms and Conditions| GRE Prep Club Rules| Contact

Powered by phpBB © phpBB Group and phpBB SEO

Kindly note that the GRE® test is a registered trademark of the Educational Testing Service®, and this site has neither been reviewed nor endorsed by ETS®.