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First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks

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First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks [#permalink] New post 14 Jun 2017, 06:31
This is my first time writing an issue essay. After writing this essay, I found out that I am not able to write a good piece of issue essay as I do not know what to brainstorm. Do rebuke my essay. Appreciate your kindness.

Thank you.

This is the issue prompt:
The surest indicator of a great nation is represented not by the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists, but by the general welfare of its people.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape
your position.



This is my response:
A great nation is generally defined as the country success in various fields such as science, arts and economy. However, a great nation does not just involved the success of its government, artist or scientist but it is the general welfare of its people.

People lives in harmony and peaceful are the essence of becoming a great nation. Despite the success of the country in various aspects such as science, arts, governance, if people are not living in peace and harmony, this may greatly affects their general walfare. For instance, if the country is in the state of upheavel due to demonstration and fighting amongst different races, this can cause issues to the country. Hence, it is essential to protect the well-being of the denizens in order to become a great nation.

On the other hand, a great nation can be represented by the achievements of its governors. If a country does not have a good governance, whereby corruption and graft happened widespread, the country would not become a successful nation. Take as an example, if a minister practices nepotism, treating the people unfairly, will the country become a successful nation? Will people be able to live happily? Surely, it is not the case. Not only this, the bad image of government will be tarnished and this would not indicate that the country is a great nation.

As a conclusion, to determine whether a nation is great and strong, there are various factors that should be taking into considerations and general wellfare is certainly not the surest or the sole indicator in becoming a successful nation.
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Re: First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks [#permalink] New post 14 Jun 2017, 09:41
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Sorry but your AWA is too short and lack of a consistent way to attack the issue.

See here for reference greprepclub-guide-to-awa-the-clear-cut-3426.html
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Re: First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks [#permalink] New post 14 Jun 2017, 10:12
Thank you for your feedback. Is it ok to write four paragraph? (Introduction, Body paragraph 1 (agree), Body Paragraph 2 (disagree), and Conclusion).
After reading the guide (GREPREPClub Guide to AWA - The clear-cut), I am still not confident to write a good issue essay or at least a decent one.
I spent more than 5 mins on brainstorming and outline. Even if I have created the outline with the points that I need to write in my issue essay, however, I do not know how to write the essay. I felt perplexed and panic after brainstorming as I do not have much time writing the issue essay.
The reason I spent more than 5 mins on brainstorming and outlining is that I need more time to think of the main ideas and appropriate examples.

In short, I am weak in brainstorming and outlining. How can I brainstorm and outline within the stipulated time as suggested in the guide (GREPREPClub Guide to AWA - The clear-cut)
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Re: First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks [#permalink] New post 14 Jun 2017, 16:07
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Well, the main problem you stick is not the brainstorming per se: 5 minutes rather than 3 minutes or else.

I think the real problem is that you are not able to create in your mind a clear idea how to attack the argument itself. I.E. what to jot down. This could depend in a more general way of a lack of knowledge of the world outside.

Reading more books or article on the internet, certainly, comes in handy.

Aside from this, it is not so much important what is your opinion. ETS does not really care. They care you write in a proper language, good vocabulary terms and follow the template that for instance, I proposed writing the guide.

The template helps you to show a coherent writing without being pithy.

There is NOT an easy shortcut to writing well: it is the result of your skills, your knowledge, how much you write on a daily basis and so on....

Hope this helps. I am confident if you study hard and smart you can do it.

regards
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Re: First time writing issue essay. Please help me. Thanks   [#permalink] 14 Jun 2017, 16:07
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